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Why do I make things?

I had recently found myself to be asking, "what am I doing this for?", "who am I creating these things for?", after hours of work on certain projects or services. What I realized, is that more than anything, I do it for myself. I feel some sort of accomplishment and happiness when I look at my "internet-resume" and can admire the things I have made. But after that I think, does anyone else care?.

The answer is probably no. At least for the majority of people. Perhaps I am unique in this nature, but when I view other peoples accomplishments, I feel only a little admiration, and the rest of what I feel is inspiration and "I could have made this", or "I want to make this". This is at least 50% of the reason I created 9chan when I was a teenager. Perhaps, admiration is merely the process of wanting to emulate. What else might I feel when viewing someone elses work? If it does not benefit me, do I just look at it and enjoy it?

I can enjoy artwork, and my definition of artwork is quite expansive. For example, I sometimes look at desktop threads on imageboard sites to admire someone elses creation, their canvas. I dont always like what I see, but when I see something I like, at least one part of me wishes to have it myself, or to recreate it. Is this what "enjoying" something is? I mean, I do enjoy it, and will continue to enjoy things this way, but I wonder if it is possible to admire, enjoy, or relish in something without wishing to have it yourself.

Back to the question of, "who am I doing this for?", I decided that there are a couple possible options. I used to do things to impress my wife, I suppose that now I create things to show to my friends, and to a lesser degree, to share with other people. Lets take Heyuri as an example, I create the service for other people to use it in a fashion that I find likeable. Sure, at its core "its for other people", but the only reason I run it is because I like seeing what those people create, I liked seeing it so much infact, that I purchased it from its owner.

Is desire the root of admiration? Let me know what you think. I love interesting emails—or maybe I should create a comment system on these posts?


Copyright © 2005 — Yuri Kuznetsov